Blast from the past

Tonight I fired up my trusty web browser, pointed it at my three old blogs, and started reading. I haven't updated anything in four years. It was a strange experience reading what the old me had to say. I didn't remember half of what I was talking about or many of those movies. At least not at first. Occasionally I made a good point or said something funny. It's good to know that I can still amuse myself even if the jokes are stale.

A few things really bothered me:

• Was I really so important that I needed to have three blogs? Did I really need one for movies, one for software development, and one for all of my other rambling thoughts?
• Was I really still using two spaces after every sentence as late as four years ago? I feel like I stopped doing that four decades ago. I can't stand that now. Dear Old Me: Stop putting two spaces after every sentence immediately. I don't care what they told you in school, just stop. A computer is not a typewriter. Also, lose weight, exercise more, and buy as much Google stock as you can when they go public. -Your Future Self
• I used the phrase "At any rate" all the time four years ago. I have no idea why.

I did what any self-respecting anal-retentive control freak perfectionist would do. I fixed all of those problems. I merged the three blogs, removed the extra spaces in places where it stood out, and deleted every last one of the "At any rate's".

Except for the ones in this posting of course.

I also cleaned up a bunch of the old links. Sadly, the web site for Professor Stink's Fart Fan no longer exists, but you can still buy them on Amazon. Be sure to check out the product description.

The Virgin Spring (1960)

Film School Project #17: Reimagine The Last House on the Left in the Style of Bergman. 3 - Good

Director: Ingmar Bergman
Cast: Max von Sydow, Brigitta Pettersson, Birgitta Valberg, Gunnel Lindblom
Unrated
89 minutes

Safari 3000 (1982)

So many questions raced through my mind as I was watching this movie: Wasn't David Carradine already in two other road race movies? Why is Christopher Lee wearing a Darth Vader helmet? Stockyard Channing was in high school a few movies ago; why does she look so old now? Wait, what do you mean its Stockard, not Stockyard? What kind of a name is that? 0 - Bomb

Director: Harry Hurwitz
Cast: David Carradine, Stockard Channing, Christopher Lee, Hamilton Camp
Rated PG
92 minutes

The Silent Enemy (1930)

I'm pretty sure that some animals were harmed during the production of this movie, but only the delicious ones. 3 - Good

Director: H.P. Carver
Cast: Chief Yellow Robe, Chief Buffalo Child Long Lance, Chief Akawanush, Spotted Elk, Cheeka
Unrated
84 minutes

A Dirty Shame (2004)

Watch it just for Big Ethel. And the Three Bears. And the meat touching. And the... Ok, there are lots of reasons to watch this. For immature adults only. 3 - Good

Director: John Waters
Cast: Tracey Ullman, Johnny Knoxville, Selma Blair, Chris Isaak, Suzanne Shepherd, Mink Stole, Patty Hearst, David Hasselhoff
Rated R
84 minutes

Miracle Beach (1992)

This movie is about as good as you would expect from a director who can't even spell his name right. 1 - Bad

Director: Skott Snider
Cast: Dean Cameron, Ami Dolenz, Felicity Waterman, Pat Morita, Dean Cain, Martin Mull, Vincent Schiavelli
Rated R
88 minutes

Dark City - Director's Cut (1998)

It really seems like a movie about aliens that capture Jennifer Connelly in order to perform perverse experiments on her should be much more interesting than this was. 2 - Meh

Director: Alex Proyas
Cast: Rufus Sewell, John Murdoch, William Hurt, Kiefer Sutherland, Jennifer Connelly
Rated R
111 minutes